Why?

"Why" is a powerful word. It drives people's curiosity. It motivates people to keep going forward to search for the answer. The answer to everything. Why things exist as they are now. Why do WE exist.

Unfortunately, "why" is also a very annoying question. Exasperating, even.



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Why do i exist in this world? What is my purpose, having put on Earth by God? What am i here to achieve?

To be honest, i wanna know the answer too. But i guess no one really knows. Until at least they made some certain impact, i guess. So i have ideas, a few actually. Of why i'm here.

Here are just train of thoughts. Pardon me, but my mind is on overdrive tonite, and i must write..since i find it hard to explain to people.

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For now, i just see myself as a "drifter". I drift from places to places, people to people, from a certain time to a certain time. Its as if i exist in stages. Stages of other people's life, not my own...

I'd like to think of it as a two-way thing. I've always thought things in this world are mutual, are in a circle. In other words, what goes around comes around. Things always exist in duos, in twos, often stark contrast of each other. Men & women. Black & white. Yin & yang.

So if i exist in someone's life for a reason, then it is the same too. They must've had to exist in my life for a certain reason too.

Perhaps my life is a life of constant learning. And somehow it is my job to preach it to others. Some selective individuals not mine for the choosing. I dunno. I somehow seem to meet sumone who goes thru something mre or less similar to me, and i find myself helping them, and in a way, them helping me too. I'm glad and thankful for it. Because i need to know my mistakes too.

Perhaps this is why i never fit in anywhere, because i go thru "stages". It's like in games...where u go to a new world and its checkpoints and u start a new adventure. And u meet new allies and new enemies...but no matter what, for sure u will gain something out of it....memories, experiences. And for sure, u will lose something too...innocence, fear, among others..

But what is most important is, YOU LEARN.

And when u're done with ur "mission" in one place, it is time to leave...perhaps not all the time on ur own wish, but things will happen that ultimately results in u leaving...because, that's where u're supposed to be heading. A new place. Life continues, ppl move on. New things to discover, new things to learn.


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I guess, in a way, that's probably why i stopped asking "why". Why certain things happened to me. Why is that particular door closed. Why do i have to suffer. Why this, why that. I felt....its really whiny. In time i learnt to lessen the "why's" and start to accept and find out the answer, rather than sitting there and waiting for someone to answer my question. No one knows really, except God.

And God will tell u in His way. So be patient, and be alert. He will push u to see the answer!

Have faith in knowing that, and don't worry so much. Let God do the worrying(sorry!), u just go with the flow....

And if it means my river is flowing continuously and i can only stop at jetties for a short while, then so be it.



P/S
- these are thoughts...stuff i analysed and deduced from my own life experiences....i'm not saying this applies to everyone, perhaps it does, perhaps it doesn't. I'm not sure if there's any rules to that, but this is just how i see it. Agree? Disagree? Always happy for a discussion. Btw, what do u think ur purpose of existence is?